SINGAPORE:

A young Singaporean’s post on Reddit has sparked a viral conversation about the mounting pressure placed on students by their parents after he revealed a heartbreaking encounter following his failure to gain admission into any junior college last year. In a candid confession, he recounted how his parents told him, “You will have no future, and you won’t be able to support us after all that we have done for you.”

Sharing his story in the 'SG exams' forum, the man expressed his feelings of inadequacy as his parents accused him of lacking effort in his studies. “I really did study; maybe my IQ was not up to their standards,” he lamented, highlighting the emotional burden he carries.

The repercussions of his academic setbacks were severe. His parents chose to ignore him for two weeks, forced him to work part-time, and imposed strict limitations on his home time, only allowing him to stay from 8 AM to 9 PM. Reflecting on his father's reaction, he shared, “That was nothing because my dad once didn’t talk to me for like a year straight.” He recalled a particularly distressing moment when his father threatened to kick him out upon his graduation from polytechnic if he didn’t secure a spot at either the National University of Singapore (NUS) or Nanyang Technological University (NTU). The young man revealed that his father even warned his mother not to assist him in any way.

This overwhelming pressure has had a profound impact on his mental well-being, leading him into a dark space where he now fears he may not qualify for further studies due to a GPA of around 3.5. “I don’t know; I never thought that this kind of thing would happen to me,” he wrote. Encouraging responses flooded in, urging him to focus on studying and reminding him that his worth goes beyond academic performance.

Many users echoed sentiments about the fine line between discipline and abuse, with one father articulating, “I don’t understand this concept of raising children so they can take care of you when you are older. As a father, I wouldn’t want to burden my daughter.”

Responses from the community varied, with some reminding him that success does not solely hinge on academic achievements. They suggested exploring alternative paths and emphasized the importance of preparing for financial independence, urging him to start saving whether or not he earns a place at university. One particularly insightful comment read, “Prepare to be independent by 21 whether or not you make it to uni, because your parents sound really unstable.”

This story is all too familiar in the context of Singapore's high-stakes academic environment, where students often feel the weight of their parents' expectations. The narrative of a student feeling utterly defeated after his father backed out of supporting his university education also appears to be a growing concern among youth, illustrating a broader trend of young Singaporeans grappling with familial pressures related to their educational paths.

As discussions grow around parental expectations and student mental health, the hope is that this young man's experience will resonate with others in similar situations, fostering a community of understanding and support. The reality remains that academic challenges do not define success, and there is always a way forward, even in the face of adversity.