What Really Happens When We Die?

Ever wondered what occurs in those final moments of life? In the hauntingly poignant FX series *Dying for Sex*, a hospice nurse provides a comforting glimpse into this often-unspoken journey. With unwavering positivity, she reassures her patient about the dying process: "Death is not a mystery... It is a bodily process not unlike childbirth."

As death approaches, natural bodily changes occur. The patient will gradually eat and drink less, spending longer hours asleep, becoming less mobile, and possibly experiencing delirium. Eventually, breathing slows, leading to the infamous 'death rattle.' Interestingly, just days before the end, some may experience a surprising 'rally'—a brief surge of energy and clarity. This particular story is inspired by the life of Molly Kochan, who, after a terminal breast cancer diagnosis, explored her sexuality and documented her journey on a podcast, later leading to this show.

The Transition Phase: Preparing for the End

Julie McFadden, a hospice nurse, highlights the transition phase that usually starts months before death. During this time, individuals may seem to drift away from their usual selves, requiring more assistance with daily tasks. Irregular conversations and prolonged sleep become the norm. The signs can be subtle, especially in patients with conditions like dementia.

In this phase, a 'detachment' from reality often manifests, where time loses its meaning and senses begin to dull. Interestingly, as food and fluid intake decreases, the body might enter a state of ketosis—a condition where fat is burned for energy. This can sometimes produce unexpected feelings of relief or even euphoria.

The Active Dying Phase: A Complex Finale

As death approaches, symptoms intensify during the 'active dying' phase, which can commence just days or hours prior to death. Here, patients often drift in and out of consciousness, experiencing irregular breathing patterns. To ease discomfort, music-thanatologists might visit, playing soothing harp music to stabilize vital signs during this transition.

A fascinating phenomenon during this time is the 'rally'—a brief return of cognitive clarity and affection for loved ones that many experience. Coincidentally, this tumultuous time can also lead to vivid hallucinations, with many recounting visions of departed friends or family.

The 'Death Rattle': What to Expect