Nation

Son Fears for His Mother's Financial Future: A Plea for Guidance Sparks Debates on Family Support and Financial Responsibility

2025-03-17

Author: Nur

In Singapore, a man's concern about his mother's financial future has sparked a lively discussion on an online forum, where he sought advice on how to encourage her to start saving money.

He shared his situation on Reddit, revealing that his parents are divorced, and he provides both of them with a monthly allowance to help cover their expenses.

While his father has been proactive about saving for the future, his mother has not adopted the same mindset. The man expressed his worry that if something were to happen, she would be unprepared financially. When he suggested that she start saving, she dismissed the idea, claiming that her children would support her if needed.

The conversation took a turn when she advised him to enjoy his money while he can, emphasizing that worrying about the future isn’t necessary since “after we die, it will go nowhere.”

Faced with the challenge of altering his mother's perspective, he reached out to the online community for advice. He proposed the idea of reducing her allowance and saving the difference for her or even investing the money on her behalf. Many Reddit users responded with a mix of suggestions and personal anecdotes, with several agreeing that saving on her behalf might be the most viable option.

One user suggested, “Cut a portion of what you give her monthly and save it for her. You don’t want to become her financial slave.” Others recommended contributing to her Central Provident Fund (CPF) account, which is Singapore's mandatory savings plan, to ensure her future financial security.

However, some responses took a more drastic approach, urging him to cut off her financial support entirely to let her see the consequences of her spending habits. One commenter shared their own experience of dealing with family members who failed to manage their finances, stating they had to step back to avoid being enmeshed in their unhealthy financial cycle.

On the other side of the debate, some participants empathized with the mother’s mindset, suggesting that life is too short to be overly cautious with money. Experiencing loss in their own circles had changed their views, leading them to advocate for enjoying life rather than hoarding savings.

Financial experts have weighed in on this dilemma, cautioning against enabling financially irresponsible behavior. They stress that while love and obligation often drive family financial support, it can inadvertently reinforce poor money management, ultimately jeopardizing both the parent’s and the child’s financial well-being.

David Kindness, a financial expert, warned that if providing assistance complicates one's own financial state—like affecting one’s ability to save for retirement—it’s crucial to establish limits. He advises shifting from cash support to covering specific expenses or setting up dedicated savings with restricted access for essentials.

This heartfelt plea for help reflects a common struggle many families face when balancing love, support, and the difficult conversations around financial responsibility. Whether through open dialogue or strategic financial planning, addressing these issues is essential for fostering a healthier financial future for both parents and children.