Picture this: a sun-soaked summer at the University of Maryland, a young woman setting off on a whim to Wales. Little did I know that this spontaneous trip would lead me to find the love of my life and uproot my entire existence.

Deciding to leave the comfort of the US in my early 20s felt like a bold adventure, but I had no idea how transformative— and challenging—this leap would be. Immersing myself in a foreign culture, I quickly learned that life abroad isn’t just about the excitement of new experiences; it also brought a whirlwind of bureaucracy, a whole new job market, and overwhelming feelings of homesickness.

The Heartache of Distance

Becoming a parent only amplified my longing for my family back in the States. I envisioned a bustling house filled with my loved ones helping out with the kids—visions of my mom swooping in to hold my newborn while I took a much-needed shower. Instead, I faced the stark reality of isolation. When I received the sad news about my grandmother’s passing, the pang of living so far away hit hard—unable to afford the flight to her funeral felt like a betrayal.

Embracing Modern Connections

Yet, time and technology have become allies in this journey. Since my move to Wales, I’ve made it a point to stay connected with my family through various apps like Skype and WhatsApp. During the pandemic, video calls became a lifeline, with my mom even finding creative ways to play games with my kids online.

Now, with a five-hour time difference, we've adapted our schedules to fit in regular chats, even incorporating my eldest son into the mix, who loves texting random life updates to the family.

Gifts Across the Pond

One of the most heartwarming ways my parents have maintained their presence in our lives is through gifts for my kids. At first, I was overwhelmed by the clutter, but then I realized these tokens are their way of saying, 'We’re here for you.' Instead of sighing at the boxes piling up, I’ve learned to cherish them as bridges connecting our families.

The Challenge of Visits

Before kids, annual trips to the US were manageable. With the arrival of my three children, however, the complexities of international travel became daunting. After a pandemic-induced pause, we’re now gearing up for our next visit, saving diligently as tickets don’t come cheap. Thankfully, family members are starting to visit us too—my sister recently moving closer has brought joy back into our lives.

Worries for the Future

As I look ahead, the reality of my aging parents weighs heavily on my mind. The thought of them not being able to visit when they’re elderly makes me anxious. How will I care for them from so far away? Preparing myself for these future challenges, I’m saving to ensure I can be there when it matters most.

Reflecting on my journey, while I wouldn’t change marrying my partner and building a life in Wales, the complexities of distance have made life far less straightforward than I ever expected.